damn~its been quite a while since i last wrote this shit. don’t blame me..blame the network of UTP. Since the first day till now, we haven’t received a proper Internet connections, neither a LAN connection. Even the LAN connection is always down every WEEKEND!! argh! It is recently that this stupid thing been better, which give me the opportunity to write this.
things getting sucker. i don’t know what else can i put the topic. but seriously, since the first day of this new semester, with new year, every little things make me annoy. Let me story from what happens recently : i fought with yana~..huhu. She seems to have a problem, but she doesn’t really want to share it with me. She thinks that it will solve by itself by doing nothing, that time will terminate the problem, which really makes me angry. For me, every single problem should be identify and solved, if not by you, by others. The important thing is it NEED to be solved. Not like me, she thinks that not every problems should be shared, which, maximize my anger (and as a result, i just leave the chatroom ignoring her~huhu). Maybe i am phony, but when your loved ones is having trouble, you won’t let him/her bear by its own rite?That’s one thing;about yana. She seems too busy, and for me to pity her, it is such a jealous when she doesn’t have time for me.. :/ and the most terrible, she seems doesn’t have time for herself. I don’t know..every people changes, but this changes really makes me uneasy.
Lets move to another thing that sucks: My own life. Last night I go for UTP orchestra guitar player screentest. It is not a success. I know I played suck. Well its kinda frustates me. Everytime i do things that sucks, i said to myself..what thing that u can do properly?? and the answers seems null. I don’t know my own ability that i can appreciated and proud of. My programming skills seems to vanish because of my lazyness. I feel like a loser. I can’t do any sports, I can’t play games better (i lost DotA games for the last 3 days..demmit!!), I don’t have any improvement. Damn it!!Another thing is : my friends and buddies. They seem too backstab me sometimes. Let me get it straight : I try to be active on co-curricular activities, and i have joined the MPPUTP Publication and Promotion Dept, Syntech Organization (IT/IS Club), and also the Orchestra UTP. Well at least i try to improve myself(and when i failed, that frustated me.), but, it is not been really acceptable by my once called buddies. I know they seem to hate MPP because of their formalities(which i don’t follow, i hate it also..eheh), but I don’t enter it to be their dog. But my friends think that is what happens. Well lets say that I joined it because it has invited me, and there’s no fuss for me to get involved. Whatever my friends say, i just don’t trust them anymore. Another fuck up story eh?heh~
Next: my studies. I have been so lazy lately, and i don’t know whether i can keep up my pointers or not. just like i say from the last blog. It happens, and i realize it, but i don’t know how to change myself. The only thing that change is my rate of going to the class ( it decreased..ehehe). but in class?? I sleep, I cursed, I build castle in the air. heh~That’s all i can say right now. My routine has changed; i still don’t sleep now, and my head is getting dizzy. I got Kembara class at 9, but..Shits always happens..Annoyance and anger always happens in life; deal with it (said Donald Trump). <<>>
things getting sucker. i don’t know what else can i put the topic. but seriously, since the first day of this new semester, with new year, every little things make me annoy. Let me story from what happens recently : i fought with yana~..huhu. She seems to have a problem, but she doesn’t really want to share it with me. She thinks that it will solve by itself by doing nothing, that time will terminate the problem, which really makes me angry. For me, every single problem should be identify and solved, if not by you, by others. The important thing is it NEED to be solved. Not like me, she thinks that not every problems should be shared, which, maximize my anger (and as a result, i just leave the chatroom ignoring her~huhu). Maybe i am phony, but when your loved ones is having trouble, you won’t let him/her bear by its own rite?That’s one thing;about yana. She seems too busy, and for me to pity her, it is such a jealous when she doesn’t have time for me.. :/ and the most terrible, she seems doesn’t have time for herself. I don’t know..every people changes, but this changes really makes me uneasy.
Lets move to another thing that sucks: My own life. Last night I go for UTP orchestra guitar player screentest. It is not a success. I know I played suck. Well its kinda frustates me. Everytime i do things that sucks, i said to myself..what thing that u can do properly?? and the answers seems null. I don’t know my own ability that i can appreciated and proud of. My programming skills seems to vanish because of my lazyness. I feel like a loser. I can’t do any sports, I can’t play games better (i lost DotA games for the last 3 days..demmit!!), I don’t have any improvement. Damn it!!Another thing is : my friends and buddies. They seem too backstab me sometimes. Let me get it straight : I try to be active on co-curricular activities, and i have joined the MPPUTP Publication and Promotion Dept, Syntech Organization (IT/IS Club), and also the Orchestra UTP. Well at least i try to improve myself(and when i failed, that frustated me.), but, it is not been really acceptable by my once called buddies. I know they seem to hate MPP because of their formalities(which i don’t follow, i hate it also..eheh), but I don’t enter it to be their dog. But my friends think that is what happens. Well lets say that I joined it because it has invited me, and there’s no fuss for me to get involved. Whatever my friends say, i just don’t trust them anymore. Another fuck up story eh?heh~
Next: my studies. I have been so lazy lately, and i don’t know whether i can keep up my pointers or not. just like i say from the last blog. It happens, and i realize it, but i don’t know how to change myself. The only thing that change is my rate of going to the class ( it decreased..ehehe). but in class?? I sleep, I cursed, I build castle in the air. heh~That’s all i can say right now. My routine has changed; i still don’t sleep now, and my head is getting dizzy. I got Kembara class at 9, but..Shits always happens..Annoyance and anger always happens in life; deal with it (said Donald Trump). <<>>
